Friday, September 11, 2009

We Transition. I want this to be big(ger).

What's interesting is that now that Alison is leaving and I am beginning a new part of my journey, alone, I realize that all that everyone has been saying about how wonderful it is that I am traveling and therefore challenging myself has really not rung true to me. Here is the thing about traveling in Europe: I am not challenged; I am having fun. Here is the thing about traveling: I sort of feel like in order to truly challenge myself in the way I want to be challenged, I need to be a part of a community and that I can't be moving around like a waif so much.

Again, I want a project. That project could successfully be completed on the road (writing. but it has not yet been possible with the lifestyle that alison has wanted to keep up. i am not so much into seeing castles right now as i am about learning. castles teach me minimally).

Now that I have the freedom to decide my next step, I am considering countless options, including Helsinki and a trip up to the Northern lights (one of the things on my list of things to do in life), immediately make my way to Spain where I have nothing prepared (only a lead on a WWOOFing job), go home, or go somewhere else crazy--like another country (where challenge will be ever-pressing)!

On this slightly cloudy and life-noisy day in Prague (which is a nice little city, but nothing interesting, despite all of my fantasies), I spend the morning looking up the alternatives.

I don't feel like this is my calling.

Alison officially leaves in like 30 minutes and I can feel something changing. The leaves are rustling.

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